Emotional Response I Didn't Expect

When I started this little experiment, I didn't ask my husband to do it with me, however, the day I started, he joined in freely and I was glad that he did, for HIM. I didn't realize until last night how much I NEEDED him to not drink to help me or how much him drinking was an influence on whether I was going to possibly be successful in this effort. Last night, he decided that he wanted a cocktail, which is not unreasonable, since he hasn't had a drink for 9 days. I instantly felt weak and wanted to drink with him (but I didn't). I was very surprised by my gut reaction. After all, this isn't his project, this is mine. I talked to him about it and he contained his drinking to one and said that he actually didn't enjoy it but I know I shouldn't have even mentioned it to him. He is very loving and supportive of all of my positive goals in life and he would sacrifice his own desires to help me and I think if I am going to be successful at this, he should be able to have a drink now and then without my interference. I did apologize for putting him in that position but, being the great guy he his, he insisted that drinking is bad for him, as well, and he shouldn't really be drinking, either.

Today may be a challenge. Some of our big time drinking buddies are suppossed to be joining us for an early dinner. They have a long way to drive and it is very, very cold so, who really knows if they will come (I hope they do because I have one huge greek salad and an enormous amount of spanish bean soup already made), but if they do, it will be interesting to see how I feel not being able to have some wine with them. It seems like the friends I have told about this, so far, are unphased and would be okay drinking without me but I am thinking that is because they think I am getting too fat and need to lose some weight and also because they think this is short lived and by the next time they see me, I will be drinking again as my history would indicate this to be my pattern.

Now, maybe you can see what I mean about my life being one party after the other. I am always doing something that could potentially involve alcohol. And, oh by the way, I didn't tell you about the TWO times this week I declined offers by different girlfriends to go out for cocktails.

Anyway, if anyone is reading this, anywhere in the U.S. (which I doubt), I can pretty much safely say to you today...STAY WARM. It is cold across the entire country, isn't it?